I would love to tell you that my romance books are born solely from my imagination and that everything in them is totally made up. But the honest truth is, I’m constantly stealing from my own life when I’m writing.
“Write what you know,” right? Well, I know my life and my past better than anyone, so it only makes sense that I pull from it. Honestly, regardless of the genre, I’d find it impossible to escape my own past experiences when I’m writing or editing. I don’t know any authors who don’t feel some personal connection to what they write; no matter how fantastical their books, there is almost always a thread of something connecting their soul to the book.
I don’t pull from my own life on accident, and it’s not something that I do subconsciously and only notice after the fact. I think I’ve lived a pretty interesting life, and I'm perfectly fine weaving in little parts of myself into my stories.
I don’t focus on bringing myself into just one character, either. From the settings to the side characters to the unexpected conflicts in the book, anything and everything from my life is fair game.
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Usually, I use my experiences as seeds of ideas for aspects of my book. it would be kind of weird if I literally just copied a conversation I had with someone or the characteristics of a particular person in my life and then pasted that into a book. I take these little parts of myself to build the world, to create my characters, and to write compelling conflict. It’s ultimately fictional, but it starts with something that’s familiar to me.
Obviously, my work as a former travel journalist is instrumental in the books I write. As a destination romance author, the setting is just as much an important part of the book as the characters or the conflict.
I actually have yet to write a book set in a destination that I have not visited. I could do it, because as a travel journalist sometimes I did write about places that I had not been, depending on the assignment. But I’ve been fortunate and privileged enough to have traveled pretty extensively, and I find travel to be one of my greatest inspirations. So when I am plotting out a romance book, I always consider what destination will best suit the story.
This was the case with the setting for Match Made in the Maldives. I wanted to have a romance that would take place between two people who are going to one of the most romantic places in the world for a totally non-romantic reason. Both Luna and Finley are there, single, to celebrate the health of Luna’s father. But as much as the two main characters try to fight it, it becomes impossible ignore the spark between them.
I also love to incorporate careers and hobbies that I’ve picked up throughout my life into my books. Although I am a book lover, I don't want all of my characters to be focused on reading or for their jobs to just be that they are authors. I prefer that they show up as unique, interesting characters that really stand out on their own. Honestly, it’s really fun to give characters unique jobs—I always love picking romance books where the main characters do something unconventional.
June, from The Half of It, is a journalist. And yes, she does get paid for her writing, but it's not for as prestigious of a publication as she might prefer. This was something I personally experienced sometimes as a freelance journalist. Sometimes, I would be writing something for a more well-known site or even a print publication, which always felt incredible and validating. But other times, I felt like I was writing clickbait articles for ad-riddled websites that paid me pennies per word.
My characters aren’t all representations of me in some form, though. In In a Desert Daze, both of the main characters have careers that I initially knew nothing about. I had to do a lot of research on what it was like being an art curator, specifically an art curator for a modern approach like pop-up museums, and I needed to know the ins and outs of running a hotel. it took a lot of work, but it was also a lot of fun.
It’s also true that some of my characters have inherited my personality, or at least some kind of trait of mine. I related hard to Luna’s perfectionism in Match Made in the Maldives. June’s tough but tender attitude in The Half of It is something that I like to think I pulled from myself in some way. And the stubbornness of Daisy from In a Desert Daze one hundred percent is influenced by yours truly. I would hardly say that any of these characters are me in fictional form—again, I just use certain quirks or traits and build a character from there. But I do certainly see some of myself in all of them.
And, yes, the people I love are in my books, too. Although my characters are not direct copies of real people, the relationships I’ve experienced with friends, family, and romantic love absolutely influence what I write. For example, one of my closest friends is someone I met on Craigslist because I needed a room and she had an empty one—which is exactly how June met Lissie in The Half of It.
And hopefully he won’t mind me saying it, but one of the reasons I am able to write romance books with kind, patient, devoted men as the main characters is because I married one. It was revolutionary for me to realize I was dating someone who knew how to apologize when I told him I was upset about something. No pushing the blame back to me or guilting me; instead, a partnership built out of respect and love. That’s why in all of my books, I always have a moment when the main characters apologize to each other for something, even if it’s small. It shows such consideration for the other person.
And while this isn’t as easy to talk about, it’s true: my fears and hangups work their way into my books as well. In my upcoming Sicily novella, the female main character has been working for a company that means a lot to her emotionally. But if she fails at the opportunity she’s given, what will that mean for her career? And what does that mean for her as a person who has dedicated so much of herself to this company? She’s struggling a lot with identity, independence, and not wanting to disappoint those around her, which…well, relatable.
So you might be wondering…who of all of my characters is most like me? Although it’s really tough to say, I think I’d have to go with Daisy from In a Desert Daze. That story came out of a very hard loss for me, and in the book, Daisy was clinging to every last shred of her mother with clenched fists. But she was so adamant about not letting go, that she was drowning in her sadness. Writing the way Daisy moved forward in her life with her grief was a part of my own healing process.
If you go through my books, you’ll find little hints everywhere of the person I am, the people I love, and the experiences I’ve had. They’re not autobiographical by any means, and you might not recognize the similarities right away, but my books are also not totally separate entities from me, either. And honestly, that’s one of the most enjoyable things about being a romance author—that I can make things up for a living, but also tuck in little kernels of truth in there, too.